tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post8800158265629402376..comments2024-03-29T00:37:50.644-04:00Comments on The Miss Rumphius Effect: Poetry Sisters Write GhazalsTriciahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18350907653629775293noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-25156873666037332692023-05-30T16:56:54.818-04:002023-05-30T16:56:54.818-04:00Trish, I also like your ideas that happen in the d...Trish, I also like your ideas that happen in the dawn and the internal rhyme. I did not have time to create a ghazal but I am sure that it would take me a good deal of contemplating on the format. Maybe you will take a look at your first draft and find a new way to use the words.Carol Varsalonahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02589714711155938528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-81890545510602213592023-05-29T12:46:39.290-04:002023-05-29T12:46:39.290-04:00OK, I actually think this is really rhythmic and s...OK, I actually think this is really rhythmic and should be read at sunrise each day from here on out! Also, I felt like you did a remarkable job of staying loose so that these couplets could be cut apart and reordered and still just sing!Liz Garton Scanlonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17941516645386392684noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-58623778166215692922023-05-29T06:47:35.928-04:002023-05-29T06:47:35.928-04:00Good technique, to choose a time frame, and to pla...Good technique, to choose a time frame, and to place the rhyme right before the refrain--that's worked for me too!Heidi Mordhorsthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16496427007514895950noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-45752561444858254382023-05-28T08:58:42.269-04:002023-05-28T08:58:42.269-04:00What a challenging form! To not only use the refra...What a challenging form! To not only use the refrain in so many separate beads/pearls, but to create a new rhyme each time. Success! Lovely. Karen Edmisten https://www.blogger.com/profile/04446214835142625161noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-84718125605553068262023-05-28T06:43:52.782-04:002023-05-28T06:43:52.782-04:00Exquisite...delicate couplets but altogether one p...Exquisite...delicate couplets but altogether one poem. Linda Mitchellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00833034575304594924noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-13287860565790052772023-05-27T22:59:00.602-04:002023-05-27T22:59:00.602-04:00You managed to get all of the couplet "pearls...You managed to get all of the couplet "pearls" in your necklace to line up! I had the same feeling of "not quite"-ness with my poem but I hope you see the good bones in yours. All of a piece of a morning, from different times and seasons - simple and effective (and I wish I'd done something so clear). Definitely a form to revisit!tanita✿davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01671822274852087499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-80178356673059855152023-05-27T17:55:44.828-04:002023-05-27T17:55:44.828-04:00Using a time of day as your refrain---oh, that'...Using a time of day as your refrain---oh, that's lovely, and each stanza adds a bit to the poem until that last one, when I imagine you not only running, but thinking of all these things you've glimpsed, and perhaps spinning a poem in your head as your arms swing! Sarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12225998457253574928noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-41812545592352271382023-05-27T17:25:23.456-04:002023-05-27T17:25:23.456-04:00Love thinking about "in the dawn!" Beaut...Love thinking about "in the dawn!" Beautiful!Marcie Flinchum Atkinshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06253511592239628178noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-85805705164020028712023-05-27T16:13:58.630-04:002023-05-27T16:13:58.630-04:00You did SUCH a great job of making the couplets di...You did SUCH a great job of making the couplets disconnected, even though they each show one dawn scene. Kudos! And the variety of scenes, from sad and painful to nervous to quietly beautiful, to your own wonderful runs. Fabulous!laurasalashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13807781795919555208noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-72255024646348739212023-05-27T12:10:27.863-04:002023-05-27T12:10:27.863-04:00Ah, your poem makes me start singing "Morning...Ah, your poem makes me start singing "Morning has broken". I like all the ways you've brought in that spark at day's beginning, Tricia, including your own action, "arms swing in the dawn".Linda Bhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14983144542632353870noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-55452392478356547382023-05-27T10:33:04.539-04:002023-05-27T10:33:04.539-04:00What I love about ghazals is the repeating end-wor...What I love about ghazals is the repeating end-word gathers the stand alone verses to form an experience that feels unified. And it's truly a delight to glimpse that teeny bit of personal in the last stanza (you, the runner). :)Patricia Franzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06291738294052016720noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-8445992188285564652023-05-27T10:06:56.047-04:002023-05-27T10:06:56.047-04:00I love this, Tricia. I enjoyed the internal rhymes...I love this, Tricia. I enjoyed the internal rhymes and the shifting in the last verses from dark to dawn.Susan T.https://www.blogger.com/profile/18089222122168879532noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-80526337639053873302023-05-27T09:00:09.353-04:002023-05-27T09:00:09.353-04:00the juxtaposition of dark & light feelings as ...the juxtaposition of dark & light feelings as the light returns in Mother Earth's slow spin - this are moving lines - appreciations.jan godown anninohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00091996699597066230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7320080607016581524.post-84765157817134341202023-05-27T07:58:08.757-04:002023-05-27T07:58:08.757-04:00Love all these glimpses of light "in the dawn...Love all these glimpses of light "in the dawn!"Mary Leehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09078793537148794310noreply@blogger.com