Fall is my favorite season, so this should have been a piece of cake, but everything came out rather trite. I still haven't figured out what I want this one to be, but I'll just have to keep working on it. The nice thing about these challenges with their deadlines is that they force me to write and let things go, even if they're not perfect or simply incomplete drafts.
Here's my poem. (I dare you not to sing it to the tune of Gilligan's Island while you read it.)
Autumn Song
It’s not the geese in flight
or curling chimney smoke
that draw eyes skyward in the night
as summer sheds her cloak
It’s not the harvest moon
low hanging in the sky
or kitchen smells that make us swoon
with thoughts of apple pie
It’s not the turning leaves
or acorn grabbing squirrels
that run among the golden sheaves
and stash their precious pearls
It’s not the crisp cold air
or early morning frost
that make us lift a silent prayer
as summer days are lost
It’s all these gifts and more
that mark our love for fall
the time and season we adore
all things both great and small
Raise a hymn to autumn
sing out in wondrous praise
of scarecrows and chrysanthemums
of short and cooler days
Sing out to orange and gold
on vibrant colored trees
to beauty that October holds
and brings us to our knees
You can read the poems written by my poetry sisters at the links below.
I do hope you'll take some time to check out all the wonderful poetic things being shared and collected today by Violet at Violet Nesdoly Poems. Happy poetry Friday friends.
First, I'm impressed that you got "scarecrows and chrysanthemums" all in a line, and rhymed it, too. And this whole poem is lilting and easy on the tongue, and filled with imagery. I know you want to tinker, but not too much!
ReplyDeleteI think this poem is lovely just as it is. It evokes so much of what makes this my favorite season.
ReplyDeleteI struggled with triteness, too, but the cliches of fall are just too TRUE and wonderful not to use them! And you worked them in gorgeously. Love the suspense that builds with each "It's not..." And those scarecrows and chrysanthemums! (And that we both used cloaks!)
ReplyDeleteI didn't notice the cloaks, but I did notice we both mentioned chimney smoke. It's one of my favorite fall smells.
DeleteYou're right -- it's not ONE thing, it's all of them, in a chorus sung to an orange and gold tune!
ReplyDeleteI so enjoyed all these hymns to autumn. I especially liked summer shedding her cloak, and all the "It's not"s that kept me pushing on to find out what it is.
ReplyDeleteI am loving all these hymns to autumn. You've captured some of my favorite images of the season.
ReplyDeleteWhat a lovely hymn to autumn! I found myself humming this to "All Things Bright and Beautiful" a hymn from my childhood church-going days. All of these hymns are prodding me to get outdoors and enjoy autumn before it's gone!
ReplyDeleteLook at you singing your autumn love song... thank you! I love the "it's not" setup. Gorgeous!
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